Pack member down
Shelley here. My ma has the flu, so I told her I’d guest blog for her this evening. It’s one of the many fine services I provide, along with groundhog extermination and garbage sorting.
She actually worked at the yarn shop this afternoon, but it seems like that pretty much wiped her out. She has taken to her bed with a jigger of Nyquil and a copy of Atul Gawande’s latest book, Better. I believe that title can only be described as wishful thinking.
But seriously, folks, she actually is better. You should have seen her on Tuesday! Fortunately for all involved (except me), I was the only one who witnessed her violent regurgitations. But it is often the dour lot of the canis familiaris to endure with our human fellows their lowest and most unattractive moments.
There ain’t no such thing as a free helping of kibble.
So seeing that one of my pack members was laid low and therefore vulnerable, I sat on her bed all day to guard her. Which was kind of bad timing, really, given how sunny the day was and how much I like to sunbathe. But…duty first!
Okay, I did go outside once during her second episode of horrific retching, but I’m sure that she perceived my brief jaunt as consistent with the “Lassie Model” of dog behavior, i.e., she thought I had run outside to seek aid and succor for her from another creature with opposable thumbs.
Actually, I had come to fear that under the circumstances, no dinner would be forthcoming and I better either A) rustle up some prey or B) find a creature with opposable thumbs and a spare sirloin who was not lying immobile in a pool of her own cold sweat on the bathroom linoleum.
You know what they say: you have to take care of yourself before you can take care of anyone else!
She showed some improvement yesterday and even drank a couple of these:
And ate a bit of—what else?—Jell-O:
She seemed especially proud of this subtly layered Jell-O treat and said something about how these were “the Rothkos of Jell-O salads.” I frankly have no idea what she was talking about. Must have been feverish.
I am certain that from here on out she can be expected to go from strength to strength. She told me to relay to you her greetings and her promise that she will at some point catch up on her e-mails.
Now, if you would, leave a little comment mentioning your strong feeling that my loyal and steadfast conduct over the past three days merits a steak dinner. She’ll listen to you.
April 26th, 2007 at 10:25 pm
Emily here. I am Saundra’s border collie and I definitely think that Shelley deserves a steak dinner with all the trimmings for her loyalty to her owner.
In the past I have had to hold down the fort too and it is no picnic.
You go, Shelley girl.
April 26th, 2007 at 11:00 pm
Shelly- You did such a great job taking care of your girl! You certainly deserve a delicious dinner. Tell her I hope she gets better soon, and her jello certainly was a work of (modern) art.
April 26th, 2007 at 11:13 pm
Gypsy here. I’m Diane’s Airedale supervisor and you clearly deserve not only a steak of of your own, but it should come with carrots (my fav veggie), a hoof to chew on at your leisure and a bowl of ice cream for dessert! This should be followed by a good lie-down on the couch, with belly scruffles.
April 27th, 2007 at 3:46 am
Shelley – I have not been owned by a four-foot for ages (and sorry, it was a cat, concurrently with two horses, so I realize it wasn’t quite the same) – however, I heartily agree that you definitely deserve steak. Quite a lot of steak, in fact. Just witness that exquisitely sympathetic, inquring look you’re wearing in that first pic! An opposable-thumb-type creature of the nursing persuasion couldn’t have done it better. And sure as heck wouldn’t have offered his/her self for soothing petting. Great job! You just keep sticking your nice cool nose in her ear to take her temp every now and then and carry on. I and my opposable thumbs salute you. (And please tell your mom I sure hope she gets over that nasty bug soon! Encourage her to rest. Lie down on her if necessary.)
April 27th, 2007 at 8:34 am
Hugo here. I believe you deserve a steak dinner just on general principles, Shelley, but especially if you had to witness violent retching. Only question left (to my mind): When is dinner served?
April 27th, 2007 at 9:12 am
Arf!
Shelley you arf amazing! You stayed with Ellen tharfough all that with no thought of youarf own health. Us giarfls all have to stay togethearf! Garfeat job! Pearfsonally I’d skip the arfequest foarf the steak and go starfaight for the chocolate! Chocolate always soothes the soul not to mention stays longearf on the lips : )
Arf! Arf!
Mavis, Airedale extraordinaire
April 27th, 2007 at 11:59 am
Hi Shelley, Our Mom read your blog to us. We think you should have broccoli and tomatoes with your steak. We have to steal ours from the garden because our human thinks we should eat mostly kibble. Doesn’t she know that dogs are omnivores? Omnivore is a big word for the Miss Piggy diet–we eat anything we can lift. Enough blogging, we’re going outside to chase the rabbits away from the birdfeeder (and eat some birdseed).
Cheers, the polarbears
April 28th, 2007 at 9:57 am
Shelly, Although we’ve never met, I understand that your biped is my biped’s daughter. Does that mean that I am your aunt? (My biped calls me “her baby.”
Family relationships aside, I believe you’ve done a great job and deserve whatever you want. Your grandmother, my biped, gives me whatever I want on a regular basis. My sister, Sarah, another biped, says I’m spoiled. What does she know?
Until we meet,
Izzy
April 30th, 2007 at 4:01 am
Oh no! Sounds awful. Get well soon, Ellen!